Horror of horrors!

So, one of the things that I don’t normally do, I am going to start doing. I am going to watch what I eat and drink. I've tried it in various forms over my life, no fast food, only whole grain bread, etc., etc. I gave up soda and later realized that while I had given up caffeine in most of its forms, it only lasted for a couple of months, and I started drinking soda again. After soda came coffee, etc., etc. Back to square one again.

But this time, I ‘m tired of looking at my gut every morning in the bathroom mirror. I’m tired of getting winded after a half hour of any strenuous activity. I’m tired of the random impulses to eat stuff that I know has no nutritional value of any sort. I’m tired of being embarrassed to take my shirt off in front of other people. (Not like I do that a lot as it is. Stop looking at me like that!) So I decided to do something about it. I’ve always lived by the motto of, “Eat right, exercise, die anyway” but now I’ve realized that by neglecting myself, I’m putting myself on a road to self-destruction. At least the weed choked, rock-strewn path to self-dilapidation. While that may be fun for a weekend, it’s not great for a lifestyle. I don’t want to be the guy whose house Jerry Springer has to cut apart to get me out. I don’t want people looking at what I eat for a typical dinner and think that someone had just gone shopping at Sam’s Club.

This attempt will begin on Monday, so this weekend, I may binge a bit. Or not. No drinking, no drugs, but Filiberto’s, pizza, maybe some quality time with the Krispy Kreme corporation. Actually, no, doughnuts really aren’t my thing. Neither are donuts. Way too… diabetes-inducing. All that, and sadly, I will have to say goodbye to a cherished friend. Yes, unfortunately, I will have to end my nearly two-decade love affair with Mountain Dew. But, you know, it’s really for the best. We’ve grown apart over the years, you know, MD is starting all those new projects like Code Red and LiveWire and I just feel that MD has really lost a sense of identity in all of it. Maybe we’ll see each other, you know, at a restaurant, the grocery store, or possibly a roller rink. Then, maybe we’ll sit and chat like old friends do, for a time. But not until I find myself a bit thinner, and not until MD comes to realize just what has become of the state MD is in.

Okay, this post has taken a really weird turn. Now may be a good time to end it.

-D out.