Good, good stuff.

I checked my mail last night (you know, that kind that is delivered to the box you unlock with a key, not your computer) and found that my copy of the movie Versus had finally come. After about a week of anticipation, this Japanese import is mine to hold forever.

Okay, it occurs to me that some of you, most of you, ALL of you have no idea why this movie is so good. Let me explain. My cousin Donovan first turned me on to this movie during a family reunion, probably a couple of years ago. When I first saw it, I couldn’t explain it. Now that I own it, I still can’t explain it. However, let me give you a brief rundown of the “plot” as it were, and then explain why it is just so cool.

This movie starts off with a flashback of a samurai-ish character fighting a bunch of zombies. Some other stuff happens, but it’s not important at the time. Fast forward to the present time. Two prison escapees, easily identifiable by the word LAWBREAKER stenciled onto their clothing, meet up with the people who busted them out. During the conversation, one guy, who isn’t important to the movie, gets shot by one of the escapees and dies. After a couple of lines of shouted dialogue and some tense pacing around in circles by the people left standing, the dead guy gets right back up and attacks. Hooray for zombies! The movie then proceeds to throw things like plot, dialogue, and common sense out the window in exchange for some good ol’ zombie killing. This is not to say the movie has no plot or dialogue, it’s just that the zombie killing takes the forefront and the movie never looks back.

The things that make this movie so great are as follows:

1. The main character; a soft spoken, apathetic, anti-hero. He doesn’t know why he’s here, and he doesn’t care. I think all he really wanted was some good yakisoba. Instead he runs around, fights the bad guys, and poses whenever he gets something to add to his image. The scene with the leather trench coat is classic.

2. The fighting. It’s fast paced, and sometimes is hard to follow, but it is so stylish (you really have to see it) that it almost makes me cry at how horribly funny it all is.

3. The supporting cast of one-dimensional characters whose motivations for being in the movie are never explained. Literally, I can count three or four characters that are in the movie for approximately two scenes.

4. The cinematography. Camera angles, rotating shots, quick zoom ins, this movie had it all. The movie even pokes fun at a couple of predecessors, The Matrix and the Evil Dead series. If this was intentional or not, I am not sure.

5. The main villain. Sure, this movie is 99% cheese, but this actor really stood out as a bad guy. Not as a bad actor, but a good villain.

6. The simple fact that everyone in this movie had perfect hair. All the time. Even while fighting. And covered in blood.

7. B-movie special effects, make-up, and blood. The fact that some gets splashed on the camera at one point is priceless.

8. The fact that no one in this movie has a name. Not one. The only one that comes close is the “police officer” that calls himself, “The Fighter.”

9. Finally, the ‘runt’ character. He has a couple of idiosyncrasies that really make this movie worth the $7.95 I paid for it.

In conclusion, if you’re looking for a movie that makes sense, look elsewhere. If you just want to see some explosions, zombies, and an eclectic mix of the two, pick it up. Even if you don’t like stuff like that, watch it anyway.